Vampire Rantings: A short story

The ravings of a little vampire. This is prompt based, with the starter given being: ‘It was just one


It was just one irritating little phrase. ‘The Undead.’ Oh, it annoyed me to no end. So many vampires referred to themselves that way. Or their ‘unlives’. Cripes it was stupid.
You see, I look at it this way. Yes, we died to become vampires, it’s all part of the process. We reanimate. We are once again animate. We need ‘food’, be it psychic energies or blood. We need sustenance. We walk, talk, argue, love, hate, whisper…all the things a regular old living breathing human would do.
I’ve never considered myself ‘undead’, or living an ‘unlife’. It’s just way too silly to me. I lead a normal life just like any other human, albeit from the whole drinking blood and can’t go into the sunlight thing. I have friends, I have pets. I clean my house. I wash my laundry…and no, I do not wear a cloak…that’s so 18th century. I have a truck. It’s handy for body disposal.
And, I don’t even drink a human dry. I just take a pint. They live. I knock them out, steal their wallets and nine times out of ten they simply think they were mugged. Oh, unless I’m…in the mood…then I will most certainly seduce a man. They hardly notice me taking nips and sips of blood in the heat of passion.
So, to all you ‘undead’ vampires out there… get with the times, man! Live life to the fullest! I mean, you have ETERNITY! Unless you get staked or beheaded. Live, don’t be stupid.

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